If I tell you
> I am not both old and gay.
then I could be either old or gay, but not both. That is $$ \
eg ( O \wedge G ) $$ is compatible (meaning , can be simultaneously true) with either $O$ or $G$, but not both.
If I tell you
> I am not old and I am not gay.
then I cannot be old, nor can I be gay. That is $$ \
eg O \wedge \
eg G $$
is compatible neither with $O$ nor with $G$.
Now, de Morgan's Law applied to the sentence $\
eg O \wedge \
eg G$ gives $\
eg (O \vee G)$. That is, it turns "I am not old and I am not gay" into "I am not (either old or gay)." It is a frequent deficiency of spoken language that there is no good way to speak the parentheses, so we use different constructions. For instance, "Neither am I old or gay." This sentence eliminates the possibility of the speaker being old and eliminates the possibility of the speaker being gay. That is, this sentence is compatible neither with $O$ nor with $G$.